You Were Told You Lack Executive Presence. Here’s What That Means.
Oct 22, 2026
You don’t lack it. You haven’t uncovered it yet.
I Got the Speech, Too
I can still remember my first deep discussion regarding executive presence from one of my performance appraisals.
It was the same coaching I got in kindergarten. Use your inside voice. Temper your passion. Color inside the lines.
It didn’t work in kindergarten either (at least there I got a snack and a nap).
You may be getting the other half of kindergarten. Sit up straight. Speak up. Look people in the eye.
Has this happened to you yet? I think it probably has, and it probably sounds like this.
You Need Executive Presence
“We really think you should work on your executive presence.”
“You’re not making the kind of impression with leadership we hoped you would.”
Or the role went to a younger colleague, because they “showed executive presence.” And the phrase made you want to flip a table.
You’ve Heard It. No One Can Quite Explain It.
Ah, the elusive executive presence. It’s still running hot and heavy in HR, corporate culture, and in a lot of the literature on what it takes to succeed. And it may be showing up in your career as something that’s holding you back.
But here’s the unfair irony of it all. They’ll tell you that’s what you’re lacking. But they can’t quite tell you what it is. According to a Truist Leadership Institute paper, there’s no accepted definition of executive presence. And in a Human Capital Institute survey of HR professionals, more than 90% agree it’s important, but only about one in four work somewhere with an official definition of it.
The Advice You’ll Get Stays on the Surface
So it’s no wonder when you seek advice on what to do, you’re typically going to get a lot of stuff that’s really superficial. Here’s some of the top advice.
- Work on your posture. Stand up straight, shoulders back, make eye contact.
- Speak up more in meetings. Get your voice in the room early and often.
- Look and sound the part. Dress for the next job, project your voice, pause before you speak.
Some of that is fine advice. But it’s all surface. It doesn’t really get at the core, so it’s not that helpful.
Here’s What All the Standard Executive Presence Advice Misses
All of it misses the core of who you are, the core of your unique value, and why you are prepared to lead at a higher level.
Fixing the surface doesn’t really fix anything. But if you take time to understand what you have and begin finding ways to articulate that to others and make that connection, everything changes.
When you uncover and learn to articulate your unique value, your outside will start matching your inside. And that’s executive presence.
I’m going to give you an example from a client I’ll call Pete.
Pete Was Hitting the Executive Presence Wall
Pete was in finance. He was progressing, but he was hitting a wall.
No one questioned Pete’s abilities. He was a top finance executive. He and his team always had their hands on the issues. Their perspective and decision-making were flawless.
But Pete came across a bit cold, abrupt, unemotional. And that was holding him back.
His Promise Came Fast
Pete and I sat down, and we worked on his unique value. When we started thinking about his promise, it didn’t take him long. And honestly, I was pretty inspired:
To build the long-term health and profitability of every business I touch, and to empower my team in that pursuit, leaving no stone unturned.
An Amazing Detective. An Amazing Judge.
It was clear Pete was an amazing detective, able to figure out even the most complex business situations and what was really going to drive the business.
He was also an amazing judge. He could make the tough rulings on what was the right, fair, and smart thing to do. Not the popular or easy choice.
What Pete Hadn’t Seen
But what was missing was that he didn’t see he had a deeper drive all along. When we probed down, it came into very clear focus.
Pete was incredibly committed to the people in his company and, ultimately, to the dedicated service the best of those people demonstrated to the customers they served. We laughed about how old-fashioned it was. But the fact is:
Quiet dedication to others is a value worth pursuing above all else.
So now I was able to help Pete realize he was more than just a great detective and judge. He was a true guardian to the clients, to the team, and to the company itself.
Then Pete Lit Up
When we saw this, Pete lit up. He sat up straight. He smiled. He instantly became the caring guy he was deep down. I could see the internal change making an external change in him, in how he carried himself.
That combination immediately started giving him the confidence, credibility, and composure he needed.
Then It Became a Question of How to Share It
And then it really became a question of how you share and show this to others. We just had to work on helping him understand he needed to share this, to make a connection with them on the mutual value and purpose they all had.
Pete has gone on to a significantly more successful career and continues to grow as a leader, increasing in rank, responsibility, and, of course, impact on his company, with his family, and even in his community.
That’s Not Some Hard-to-Define Executive Presence
That’s about having a unique value and purpose, and connecting with others to inspire them to commit alongside you.
Try This Week: Three Sentences and One Conversation
So, how do you apply this in your own life? Here’s something to try this week.
1) Dig deep. What do you care most about in what you do, in your job or career? Why does it matter at the deepest level? Go ahead, make yourself uncomfortable. Inspire yourself.
2) Find your best moments. Then ask yourself: when have I been most like this? What were those moments when I was at my best?
3) Write it down in three sentences:
- Your purpose, what you say.
- When you are at your best, how you look, act, and feel.
- How others can see and recognize that, what they will see and experience.
4) Read it out loud. This is something I do for myself. Literally read it out loud to yourself, first thing in the morning, last thing at night.
5) Share it once. Promise yourself that one time this week, you’re going to have a conversation with someone where you can share this and have a meaningful discussion.
The three sentences are the internal change. The conversations you have with others are where it becomes the external reality.
Where Is Your Story Breaking Down?
You’re not imagining it.
Presence shows up when your value is clear to other people, so start by finding out where your story is clear and where it isn’t.
Over the last ten years, working with more than a thousand leaders, I built a scorecard to answer that question. I built it for managers, senior managers, and directors who are doing the work and done waiting for someone to notice, because watching talented, hardworking people get overlooked is the unfairness I’ve never made peace with. I call it the Rising Leader Clarity Score™.
5 questions, 2 minutes. You score yourself honestly, not on how you see your work, but on what people say about you when you’re not in the room.
You’ll have something on paper you didn’t have before: one number that shows you exactly where your story is breaking down, and what to fix first. The number isn’t a verdict. It’s the starting point for the bigger career and life you’ve been dreaming about.
Take the Rising Leader Clarity Score here
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